White Men Can't Jump - or Apologize Correctly

Don Imus, for all his obnoxious, caustic, bad jokes, finally after decades on the air, has done us all a favor – four actually. First, he has exposed the racism and sexism running rampant among some of those purporting to be black leaders in this country. Not all, but some, those who have been around the longest and those who are the most vocal and, unfortunately, most likely to show up on TV and radio most often. Second, he has enabled the more reasonable leaders in the black community to emerge as we see them take issue with and attempt to repeal the Jackson-Sharpton Act. Third, he has forced a discussion of the hip-hop garbage culture. Fourth, he has caused a discussion of the culture of apology; ultimately, we will decide which U.S.A. we are – the United States of America or the Unending Stream of Apologies.

If you are a white male in America, there are a lot of people lined up, waiting for an excuse to jump all over you. Ultimately, you will screw up (and by screw up, I mean offend some member of the politically correct police somewhere), and will be punished under the Jackson-Sharpton Act. Am I going to defend Imus? Not a chance. Even by my standards, he made a stupid mistake. Especially since he knew that there are those out there just waiting to pounce on him. He apologized to the people he wronged. The Rutgers Women’s Basketball Team had the discussion they needed to convince themselves that it was a sincere apology, and then graciously accepted. They also got a little publicity in the process (good for them) and a couple appeared to have been coached to whine a little (scarred for life? Yeah, right). The black leadership in America, unaffected by the remark, refused to forgive, with or without punishment. Imus’ punishment is currently roughly equivalent to that of a child molester in Vermont. We could really use some serious priority setting here.

I am also not going to go through the litany of missteps that reveal the hypocrisy of Jackson and Sharpton – missteps for which they are neither expected nor required to apologize. However, if you are a white male in this country, you are required to be perfectly politically correct.

But I am going to express my disgust for the actions on Fox News of one Malik Shabazz of the “New Black Panther Party” who called Michelle Malkin a political whore, basically, because she has not allowed him to brainwash or bully her. I hope that, by his standard, there are a lot of us whores. Jackson and Sharpton are absent in their non-condemnation of Shabazz. Malkin, although one of the toughest individuals I have seen on the tube and perfectly capable of holding her own, is, after all, a woman of color and therefore should qualify for protection under the Jackson-Sharpton Act. The act has, conspicuously, not been invoked.

Shabazz also refused to apologize for pre-lynching the Duke Lacrosse players, but instead asserted that Mike Nifong botched the case. The implication is that Mike Nifong owes an apology to the stripper who falsely accused the Duke players. Hmmmmm – lynching without a trial – isn’t that one of the wrongs that slave owners and the Klan were accused of.

On the same show, Opio Sakoni blamed the founding fathers - George Washington, et al, for today’s murderous, degrading rap lyrics while failing to thank them for the their contribution to the 2005 academy award winner - “It’s Hard Out There for a Pimp.”

So here are the rules as I understand them from America’s longest-tenured, most vocal black “leadership.” This is what I refer to as the Jackson-Sharpton Act.

• If you are black, you can never do anything wrong unless you agree with a white person, and therefore are neither expected nor required to apologize for anything else - ever. Additionally, any non-black who claims that you have done something wrong is wrong and must apologize.
• If you are not black, you must always apologize for something, even if it was George Washington’s fault (This is the Sakoni Amendment to the Jackson-Sharpton Act).
• Your apology may be accepted by the black people you offend, if they are not leaders, because they are regular people like you and me, capable of forgiveness.
• Your apology will never be accepted by black leaders, but you need to do it anyway and then jump through hoops for them personally, so you can express your disgust with slavery, which you are not qualified to speak about anyway.
• If you are not black and do something wrong to a white person, you must search for a black person to apologize to. If you can’t find one, you must apologize for that.

During the course of my career, I have been told that although I was qualified for promotional opportunities, I would never get them because I was the wrong color and/or the wrong gender. Not that big of a deal to me in the long run, but it did happen and continues to happen to people every day. So who are the slaves now?

I’m pretty sick of being told that I should be at the back of the bus; I’ve never sent anyone there, I’m not going there, and you shouldn’t go there either, whoever you are.

And that’s the view today from here at the bottom.